Week 5

What an amazing week! I got my test results back and I must say that was the hardest e-mail I have ever had to read. I think I sat and looked at it for about 10 minutes before I could actually open it to get the results. I immediately had an overwhelming feeling of relief when I saw that the test results were normal and that I did not have Lupus!!

Soon after those negative thoughts started to creep back in. I started to say to myself...If it is not Lupus then what the heck is it? Will I ever know what is really going on with me? Will I ever be normal? Will I ever be able to run again without pain? It is so easy for me to go to the negative. It is such a comfortable place for me. I really having a hard time pulling myself out the negative and directing myself back to the positive. I am sure it will get easier as time goes by. (being positive here) I just have to keep reminding myself to find the good and not focus on the bad.

Not only did I get my test results back this week, I also got to finally meet Lizzie!! For those of you who do not know Lizzie, she is my "little sister" that I am mentoring for the Big Brother Big Sister Organization. As I peeked into her classroom, I immediately picked her out of the class. She was just as I had imagined. When she came out into the hall to meet us, she was not sure who we were or what was going on. Once Anthony (the director of BBBS) told her that I was the big sister that she had asked for, she came right over and gave me a big hug. It was such a special moment. I really had to work hard to hold back the tears. Well, I guess I did ask God to soften my heart last week. Right?

After we had our meeting with the director from BBBS, Lizzie gave me a tour of her school. We spent the rest of our time in the library. I had stopped at Michael's craft store and picked up a project that we could work on together and to also help break the ice. When I gave her this simple gift, you would have thought I had given her the world. The look on her face was just priceless.

Lizzie does not have an adult in her life that she can talk to so I feel so blessed that God has given me this opportunity to be her mentor. I am so excited to get to see her again this week! I can't wait to get to know her better and for us to start a new friendship. : )

This week I have decided to work on not interrupting others. The other day, Joyce Meyers was saying that interrupting someone while they are talking, is like telling them I could care less what you have to say. I never realized that was the message I was sending to someone when I would interrupt them. I think over the years like anything else, it has become a bad habit. Sometimes I will catch myself and it will take all I have not to put in my two cents. So for this week I am going to work hard on not interrupting others, listen to what others have to say, and try to stop talking so much. Yes, I did say not talking so much. For those of you who know me, know that I am capable of having a conversation with a brick wall and could probably sell ice to an Eskimo. So this could definitely be a mission impossible. lol

Wait on the positive side, I might have to work on this one for a life time but at least I am working on it. So when God ask me to walk through those pearly gates, I will walk right on in quietly and not interrupt him. ; )

Hope everyone has a blessed week!! Oh and I would love to give a shout out to my readers in Canada, Belgium, Spain, United Kingdom, Netherlands, Brazil, Finland, and France. How cool is it to have readers in other countries!! It just amazes me how my blog has spread. I have only given my blog address out to close friends and family and I have readers from 9 different countries?? I guess you write it and God will spread it. ; )

Thanks again to all of you who take the time every week to read my blog and who have joined me on this spiritual journey. Please keep all the e-mails coming. It means the world to me to read all of your sweet words of encouragement and support.

Hugs & Prayers,

Kimberly